Today, while toiling away typing patient demographics for hours on end, I had quite a bit of time to think. This activity, while necessary for the survival of a medical billing company, does not require me to use total concentration. My mind often wonders to the most random things. Today, I remembered something that I haven’t thought of for a long time. I recalled something that I used to do as a kid that was totally a sign that I have OCD. Let me first explain how terrified I was of the dark. I was TERRIFIED OF THE DARK! It was so bad sometimes that I either a) slept with the light on, or b) forced my little brother to sleep on my bedroom floor. Looking back, I’m amazed that he cooperated! I remember being scared almost my entire childhood. It got worse when my mom moved to our house in town, which no joke is haunted and I think that as a kid, I always knew. To hear more of our haunted house, visit my mom’s blog. She wrote a post that is all about our “others”. Here’s the post, in case you’re curious: “Our Others.” I think it only dissipated when I was entering high school. I’m not sure what did it, but I’m so glad that I did finally get over it.
Anyway, there were times when I was too terrified to even peek an eye out from underneath my tightly wound comforter, aka my safe haven from the dark. I remember that even if I was having trouble breathing or sweating like a pig, I still wouldn’t get out of the covers.
In order to combat the fears that I had, kid Megan came up with a routine that was certain to keep all the “bad stuff” away at night. I would, under the safety of my comforter of course, say good night to EVERYTHING in my room that I could think of at the time. In my mind, I would say good night to my family, then my friends, then my dog, my blankie, and even such things as furniture. It was a weird thing that I did, but after I did it, I would peek my head from out of the comforter, a little more relaxed and much, much cooler. Finally, I would be able to fall asleep. This went on for awhile. I did it at my dad’s house when we all lived there and continued doing it when we moved to our new house. I was weird little kid, but I can’t take all the credit. Thank you OCD 🙂
Also, I still sleep with a blankie.
Thanks for reading!