Today I should have gone to therapy, but I cancelled my appointment. I am taking the next two weeks to consider the things I’ve already learned and work on those. Plus, I was overwhelmed at work and I didn’t want to leave and then have to make it up later. Next week, I will be taking some vacation time, so I didn’t want to make any appointments during that time. In the meantime, there won’t be any updates on my therapy sessions.
The last couple of days have been difficult. I have had to deal with office talk of illness, which doesn’t seem like a big deal, but it is to me. It makes me uncomfortable and I hate feeling like that in my work environment. It just overtakes my mind and distracts me from the things I’m working on.
Anyway, this post is not going to be talking about all of that. The only way I made it through these last couple of days, or the last couple of years, was with the help of my support system. Most recently, this support system has been mostly made up of so many kind, supportive, and understanding fellow bloggers. I can’t tell you how much all of you have done to comfort me in days that have been difficult and encouraging me to keep on improving myself. It is an awesome feeling to know that there are SO many others out there in this world, who share the same feelings that I do. In my small little world, I have been the only one with my issues. This blog has brought me close to people from all over the globe who understand my issues and can relate through their own. Thank you everyone for your support.
In the past couple of years, there have been two integral figures in my life who have helped me through the difficult times and who have encouraged me to find the real me. One of these people is my boyfriend, who is much more than that. He’s my best friend, partner in life, and lover. Without him, I doubt I would have had the courage to seek professional help and to continue on seeking treatment years later.
The other individual is my wonderful mother. It’s astonishing how alike we are! We are constantly finding things that are uncannily similar between us. She has the exact same fears as me and has an anxiety disorder like me. I can confide in her easiest because I don’t feel ashamed by my thoughts or feelings and she knows exactly where I’m coming from. Not to mention, she is kind of a medicine woman. She is not a doctor, but she is smarter than most doctors I know and she has a great understanding of physical ailments and natural remedies and cures. I swear, there isn’t an illness that exists that she doesn’t know something about 🙂
The point of all this is understanding the importance of a support system. Without one, I KNOW I wouldn’t be where I am today. If you are lacking someone in your immediate, physical life, then know that I and many others are here for you. I am always glad to help when I can. Also, don’t be ashamed to ask for help! I know I was. It took me 4 years to get up the courage to discuss my issues with my partner and now that it’s all out in the open, so much more progress has been made in improving my mental health. I feel like I’m finally getting to know the real me behind the anxiety.
Don’t live life afraid of being you.
Thanks for reading.