It Came And Went, Yet Here I Stand

DSC_0066
Random fall-esque pic

I am feeling pretty down tonight and a bit embarrassed. I knew this time would come eventually, but just wasn’t expecting it to happen so suddenly.  I am talking about my recent obsession with Lolita fashion.  I kid you not, it has been the only thing that has occupied my mind for the last week or so.  I even made the dress as a way to practice to make my own Lolita dress!  I bought a petticoat and finally got it, tried it on, hated the way it made me look, and just like that, my obsession was over.  I feel nothing for Lolita fashion now.  I have stopped looking at pictures on the internet, trolling DIY tutorials, and looking for good sales on Lolita fashion.  It has stopped dead.

You have witnessed the birth and death of one of my obsessions.  It has been interesting for me to see.  I’ve never documented one of them in such a way, so I can see my behavior a little more clearly.

I guess I’m just glad I kept myself somewhat under control and didn’t go and buy something way too expensive, only to have regrets tonight and probably for awhile to come.  In a way, I’m glad it’s over.  I was fretting far too much on how I would acquire different aspects of the fashion, how I could afford it, and how I could meet other Lolitas.  Not that I find anything wrong with Lolita fashion.  Not in the slightest. I think the fashion is unique, beautiful, and has a purpose.  I admire anyone who can maintain an interest in something and continue on with it for months and even years and be true to their interest.  Times like this make me wonder who I really am.  I just never know what it is that I really enjoy and what my hobbies, if any, are.  I will be honest and say that I hate this aspect of myself.  I really, really wish I wasn’t this way.

My mom does the same thing with fleeting obsessions.  She has for a long time.  For the last few weeks, she has coached me through this and encouraged me not to buy anything unless I was certain that I could afford it without compromising my living situation.  Good advice.  🙂  I’d be a lot worse off if it weren’t for that encouragement.

Anyway, I’m just glad that I could get that out there in the open. You won’t be hearing much, if anything at all, about Lolita fashion on my blog anymore.

Sorry to be a Debbie downer, but that’s life 🙂

Time to smile and move on to tomorrow.

Thanks for reading!

Megan

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119 thoughts on “It Came And Went, Yet Here I Stand

  1. Well, I do not live with OCD, but I do live with Bipolar Type I disorder so I can relate to your feelings of being down and anxious. It can be a struggle everyday just to get something accomplished. What is Lolita fashion? I am a jeans and boots kinda gal. 🙂

      1. Yeah, not everyone can understand what it is like to live with what can be debilitating symptoms of any mental health issue. Its kind of a “walk a mile in my shoes” kind of thing. I am definitely going to Google Lolita fashion.. I am curious now. 😀

      2. I did. Some very cute shoes. My biggest compulsion, if you can call it that, is books. I have hundreds of them, and I haven’t read about 15% of them. But I keep collecting. A Kindle comes in handy when you like books. They can hold about a thousand or more. I can’t even go in to bookstores.

      3. I have a kindle and love it. I actually find that I read books quicker. I also like that you can just have any book instantly. Pretty awesome piece of technology 🙂

      4. It is pretty cool! I didn’t think I would like it as much as I do because I have always had a thing about books with pages, but the Kindle rocks. You can take it anywhere! 😀

      5. The shoes are cute, and some of the dresses would be really pretty with like a small petticoat. I had to wear one once for a wedding. OMG! Never doing that again:)

      6. I know. Besides the color of the bridesmaid gown (tea rose, eeewww), the petticoat was the first thing I took off once the wedding was over.

        Its kind of like those Victorian women and the corsets they wore. Those did real physical damage.

  2. You are not alone Megan. Trust me. Most of us get caught up in the bright and shiny, just to realize within days, weeks or months that it isn’t really us for whatever reason…
    The only obsession that I have ever managed to maintain was loving cats and I don’t think I could stop doing that if I tried!

    1. THank you for understanding. That sounds so much like me 🙂 I am still and always will be obsessed with cats too. Having baby Chester is a constant reminder to their greatness 😉

  3. Well hun look at it this way. Instead of throwing money away, you CREATED something with your own 2 hands. To me, it means to saw a challenge, you accepted it, you kicked its butt, and now you are looking for the next one.

    No Debbie downer time, I’d say its triumphant tina time! Start looking for what you will do next kid. Proud of you.

    1. That’s a great way to look at it 🙂 I just need to look at the experience in a different light. I like that phrase, “triumphant tina”. Cute 😉 Thanks for always being proud of me. Someone needs to be!

    1. Thank you for saying that 🙂 I guess I did look at it in a somewhat positive light. I would like to try to make different skirt styles. I recently found burdastyle.com and love it! so many ideas 🙂

      1. I just took a look at that site, there are some great patterns! I wish I had the patience to sew clothes. I can only do little sewing projects like toys and hats for babies.

  4. Reblogged this on jenusingword's Blog and commented:
    I should of read before my last reply. Again though, It makes me think of my mention of scarves. I think you should focus on some trends for the season. Maybe just one. Then obsess away, lol. That’s how I do these days with my overwhelming OCD. At least with the shopping aspect of it, my impulsive part or things. Don’t feel too down on things though. Just like the Lolita thing, you will move on. Feel better.

  5. Oh, please make something else! You’ve done an amazing job! And you look adorable in it! You’re young and it’s time for experimentation. I’m 63 and I’m still figuring out what I like, what looks good. Fashion is different from style. By experimenting, you’re finding your own style. Life is a banquet, have a taste of everything! xxNana

    1. Thank you 🙂 I was thinking of making a circle skirt next. They are pretty easy from what I’ve read and I got a pattern from burdastyle.com for free. THank you again Nana 🙂

  6. I can relate a lot–I still have an admiration for Lolita fashion and the people who can pull it off, but I just don’t feel it’s right for me as much as I’d love it to be. I’ve made some disappointed attempts, too. As with any fashion sub-culture, I admire the people who commit to it and do such creative things with it, but if I’m not willing to commit, I’m best just admiring than doing a half-way attempt!

    1. I feel the same way. It’s a bit expensive to buy pieces of Lolita attire and I would have not been committed enough to buy everything. It was definitely a half-way attempt 🙂 Glad you understand!

  7. Oh, that’s interesting. Perhaps, if we are really intense about an interest our minds just need us to back way from that interest because we are using too much energy on it. Anyway, you have had some learnings and now it’s on to something different and more adventures.

      1. I was incredibly good at biology when I was at high school. My teacher wanted me to continue with it for my final year. But I couldn’t. My brain simply couldn’t take the intensity of it anymore, so I did geography instead. My biology teacher was so disappointed and it was hard to explain to her why I couldn’t continue.

  8. Don’t be so hard on yourself! It’s okay to do something once and be done with it. You’re not expected to be gung-ho about every new hobby or interest. Most people are experts in just one or two things, really! I think the fleeting interest is normal. It’s the huge intensity and let down you feel now, that seems more worrisome. But not like “OMG, Call the Doctor!” More like, (((hug))) it’s cool, you’re okay.

  9. Hi Megan – Thanks for the likes on my recent posts. I was really touched to receive your feedback as you have such a large audience and are so busy keeping up with the comments. Also I was surprised to note the one on “older persons” caught your eye 🙂 Now about you. Don’t worry too much if obsessions come and go. That’s the nature of the word. Others call it experience. It’s the beating yourself up about it that you should try to put aside. Draw the positive out of it. You have learnt a new skill. Also, you have a new dress that only needs the bodice tightened and looks fine. Or unpick it and use the material again. Nothing is lost! GG

  10. I can’t make anything clothes wise at all!! I’m impressed that you did it on your own instead of buying something that in the end you weren’t going to like. 🙂 I go through obsessions like that often (much to the consternation of my husband) My latest is corsets. A friend of mine makes them and I’m totally in love!! I’m begging her to make me one and my husband keeps asking if I’m sure (considering if I end up liking this and not giving up on it they are roughly 300 or more) So we’ll see how long this obsession lasts. *suffering sigh*

    1. Thank you! I think that a corset would be a cool thing to have. I’ve always wanted to have one actually 🙂 I can see why your husband would be concerned though 😉 I’m sure your friend must do fantastic work

  11. Megan! There is nothing wrong with not fixing your attention on something for extended lengths of time. So you are gregarious. So what? You have eclectic tastes. So what? Your obsessions come and go. No bad thing 🙂
    It is wonderful that you can take an interest in something and then work you’re way through it whilst the fire lasts.
    I used to envy people who could wholeheartedly focus their whole selves on something, but then I realised that there is nothing wrong with not being that way either.
    We are many things. Why should we want to be only one? Nothing satisfies me on its own, but I’m happy about it now. People like me and you simply find enjoyment in many different things and that’s ok. Just have fun! Enjoy the journey. Try things out and be unembarrassed about it.
    And yes… being savvy with what you spend your money on was great advice from your mum: wise lady 🙂
    Big hug!
    Vic

    1. Thank you Vic 🙂 That’s actually a great way to look at this. I do struggle with envying others who are loyal to a few interests, but you’re put things into perspective a bit. We are simply just more interesting people 🙂 Thank you!

  12. I can definitely relate to that feeling of being really into something and then all of a sudden losing interest. I find it really frustrating. I’m an artist and this is where I see this pattern played out the most. I will have an idea of something I want to make, in my head it is the best idea in the world and then somewhere along the making process my opinion changes and it becomes so mediocre to me that I have no interest in finishing it. Anyway, just wanted you to know that I hear ya x

    1. It is really frustrating. I do the same thing. I make something seem so great and then for some reason or another it is so uninteresting to me. I love supporting artists and I would love to see some of your work 🙂

  13. You did good resisting that urge to buy things you really don’t want after all. I just go thru life as-is, I no longer have high expectations of adventures, being rich, being one of the jones, instead I just face each day trying to smile and hope its a good day. I no longer seek out stimulating projects, shopping trips, are neat places to go because I know that feeling of obsessing and I hate that feeling. Always remember when you feel the impulse creeping in think it through before you react, it will not only save you money and time but it will also give you a peaceful feeling in the end. But however if you have extra money to spend as you wish then by all means splurge once in awhile.

    1. Good advice 🙂 I just need to stay away from crafting pretty much. I think that I get caught up in the what if of everything and just want to find out what something is like or I just want to have it. I hate that feeling too.

  14. Let’s face it, we do not know until we try. Only then will we know if we are comfortable with it. But the lens and the mirror do not show what truly is our own eyes can deceive us. Keep on smiling it makes the day much more pleasant.

  15. Megan, I too can totally relate. I have bipolar and I have a hard time trying to realize who I really am. My interests and even opinions can change on a dime. So, don’t feel so bad sweetie xx

  16. That’s great! I actually read this picture about a psychologist explaining the effects of stress and problems. The longer you hold the glass the heavier it would get because your arms gets strained. Same goes to stress and problems, the longer you bare them on your shoulders the more it would affect you. To be honest, I’ve been in such position like yours a bunch of times. I can understand like currently you are the happiest person in the world then boom, anxiety and paranoia comes in. I am not diagnosed with anxiety, paranoia, and OCD if you are wondering but I get them a lot or so I claim (Yes, I am weird). But at least you move on, and no way you can be a Debbie Downer! That’s my job, hahahah xD.

    If you have time check out my blog: fathomofthemind.wordpress.com

  17. I don’t hate this about you Megan! 🙂

    I think it’s something that probably endears you to the people who care about you – certainly to me! I think it’s great that you’re focusing on not spending too much money on your obsessions, and I see how it can be upsetting for you – I do. On the other hand, I also think that spending a lot of money on your interests is kind of a distinctly Western thing (correct me if I’m wrong or if you have a different opinion, or if I’m neglecting some other aspect that I, not dealing with OCD, am not understanding!). People may lament the expense of an interest in soccer, for example, without considering that they could get some friends together, borrow a ball, and play in the park instead of joining a team for a fee. A friend of mine quit making art altogether because they can’t afford expensive, professional quality paint. Sometimes, there is a simple, inexpensive solution, that’s all. And then it’s not a big deal financially if you lose interest.
    I think having had lots of interests makes you…interesting 🙂 You can probably talk to a lot of people about a lot of different things, and every time you learn something new you’re making brain connections and becoming an even smarter cookie.
    You are you – you are defined by your heart and brains, brains that get smarter with each interest that you’ve had – not just your current obsession. I think you are able to have a broader worldview and understand more people because of the varied interests you pick up and then drop. Lolita fashion may not be your preferred look on yourself, but you know what? Now you’re never going to be one of the people who stare and make ignorant remarks about girls in Lolita wear.

    Anddd that is my two cents!
    Great reading your posts, as always 🙂

    1. This is an incredible way to look at this. It’s something that I have never thought of in that way. I suppose having experienced all of these different hobbies and interests does in turn make me more knowledgable about varying subjects 🙂 I do find that I can talk to people more about things like sewing or painting for instance. Maybe I am more interesting than strange 🙂 THank you!

  18. I get where you are coming from. I get hot and cold for things really quick. I hate that. I have no true obsessions except for doctor who – even then its starting to die down

  19. There’s nothing wrong with having an interest that has a lifespan… I think most people go through that. I know my wife and I do. And what’s better, you learned a skill from it (sewing). It’s not a downer at all.

  20. Megan, you accomplished a lot. You found something that really interested you–maybe you thought about it more than some–but you started with an idea and came up with a way to accomplish it. Mom’s are such wonderful resources to keep us in line 😉 I felt your pride when you showed us your finished product. Maybe the Lolita fashion will not be your thing, but you learned that you can start a project and be successful completing it—and you didn’t empty your bank account. The sense of accomplishment is the prize–in my opinion.

    We all go through life thinking we are following some type of dream, only to find out that what we were dreaming of (or obsessing about) was not even close to what we truly wanted. I have a huge problem with obsessive thinking–I swear, with all the knowledge I have gained about cancer, and sibling grief, I should go into some sort of profession. What my obsessive thinking does, is creates ultimate exhaustion in me. I become a couch potato, and don’t move forward. I stay stuck in my obsessive thoughts.

    The fact that this was a positive action for an obsession, hold on to your sense of accomplishment and what you learned from the experience. That is what is important. ❤

    1. Moms are great at keeping us in line, mine particularly. I don’t know where I’d be without her support. I guess looking at the experience in this light makes it seem much more positive. At least my obsession wasn’t harmful for negative. I did learn something valuable, which I’ve always wanted to learn anyway. I just get, like you said, so exhausted from thinking about it all. That’s what takes it out of me. It can be quite frustrating.

  21. I tend to be the same way with obsessions. I will find something, attach to it like it is giving me life and just as quickly jump off. It can be frustrating to say the least.

  22. Think of it as investigating! You even had the OPPORTUNITY to try making something & develop/cultivate your creative skills. Sounds like a success! So you decided it wasn’t for you? No biggie! You followed a path to see how much it interested you. Exploration, creativity, and authenticity. Sounds like success to me! Hearts to you & baby Chester!

  23. I have obsessions too, also because of my OCD. They seemed to be worse when I was a teenager than they are now. Usually for me its books and movies (when I was a teen it was music – oh man….its horrible to obsess over Les Miserables!), what’s worse are the TV shows. Oh man, I hate obsessing over TV shows. With the ease of Netflix I can sit and watch full seasons in a day if I so choose. And that’s just not healthy. LOL Sometimes it can be good when I’m working on homework – I just let netflix go and the show is just background noise.

    The downside is when the seasons are done or the trilogy is finished, etc. I hate the feeling of “now what” I have afterward.

    I’m a serial crafter too. I have so many different crafts and hobbies that I start but never finish….I lose the buzz after a while. I don’t know if its the loss of the buzz that bothers me most or just getting overwhelmed or bored. I don’t know. We haven’t explored the whys of having so many interests yet in my therapy.

    1. I obsess over TV shows now too and you’re right, Netflix is part of the culprit 😉 I’m REALLY into American Horror Story and the Walking Dead. I like the term “serial crafter.” Fits me to a T. Glad you know where I’m coming from! 🙂

      1. Oh man, I feel good that I didn’t get too into American Horror Story. It really terrifies me (although I’m watching tonight’s season premiere – my husband and I were watching season 2 episodes back to back before the nightmares started).

        Serial Crafter. It should be a badge we can all wear. The thing I remind myself is that because I have so many interests my life really isn’t ever boring. I’m always interested in learning something. If I kept to one craft or one hobby forever I would be so freaking bored. Granted I do get bored because I try to do it all way too fast and way too quickly – the fast burn of obsession.

      2. AHS is pretty addicting and yes, it is a little scary. The first season is scarier than the second. I’m starting the third tonight. I like scary shows though 😉

  24. I can really relate to this, trying/finding one thing and use all of me on it and than it’s over and I feel so empty and down and anxious and so tired of myself. I will thank you for sharing this so open, it helps me readin blogs like yours ❤

  25. While I didn’t see it with the petticoat, it looked beautiful on you without. So at least you got a gorgeous dress out of this obsession. And proved to yourself that you can in fact sew and create.

  26. My budget sheet, which I use constantly, is what keeps me from buying sprees and such. I look at that balance form and know I can/can’t do something. It’s great.
    I am glad you escaped unscathed.
    Scott

      1. I use excel and have some formulas in it so I don’t have to do everything. I started out, though, just using a sheet with no formulas and keeping track.
        It has worked well for me so far.
        Scott

  27. ooooh I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Yes, this is what I go through on almost a daily basis. And yes, they most often mean spending money. I literally get up, drop everything, shower, dress and head out to pick up what I need for my latest fling with obsession related fancies.
    I had a curtain obsession this week. I have one curtain hanging up, which was find until I moved my room around on the weekend and now I need two to cover the whole window. Well of course I want the same curtain but they are almost an hour away and I was going through an agorophobic time which happens in high stress and nobody could take me. OOOOH THE STREEEESS. However just 2 days later I couldn’t care less and I was perplexed as to how I could go from calling people who could be with me to leave the house so I could get this damn curtain in almost a panic to not giving a damn within 48 hours…what’s with that?!

    1. Oh poor dear! You sound just like me 🙂 I do this alllll the time. I freak out about wanting, which feels much more like a desperate need, in the moment that I don’t care who I have to bother to get it or the money it usually ends up costing me. I have so many things that just end up sitting there and I could care less for. I just tell myself to breathe and to remember the more important things like food and bills! 😉 I’ve been thinking writing a list of why I “need” the thing every time this happens, or track it via Pinterest, which I’ve recently started working on. Just some suggestions! 🙂

      1. oh you DID end up working on tracking via pinterest?! You were worried that was going to make you MORE obsessed. Let me know how that goes because seriously if it works I’ll add another board.
        I’ve found just asking myself if I really “need” something helps tremendously but that’s only when I’m out and about. When the bug in my ear is full steam ahead with a new ‘bright idea’ it’s an obsession.
        I have started lay-buying though! I never let myself have more than 2 lay-buys at one time and I have six weeks then to slowly pay off what I want and I have before chosen to return some items at the time I pick up the lay buy because the ‘need’ has gone.

      2. We have perhaps one store that does lay-away(buy), and most stores have done away with it, but perhaps I should take my obsessions to the one store 🙂 I like the idea of getting some time to consider a purchase. I have ended up returning some things that I’ve bought and was glad that I could return them because I definitely don’t need them (e.g. a petticoat)!

      3. OH. MY. GOSH. No lay-buy? I don’t even…I can’t even comprehend! the only stores here that don’t lay-buy are small boutiques and grocery stores!

        I always hated lay-buy and only started this last few months because my need for instant gratification (of the obsession as you know) is too overwhelming but as I have calmative treatment I find I can be aaaamost as satisfied knowing the purchase has been made, I am just be sensible with my money. Which is also something I enjoy being so it’s working so far. Plus bonus, get to get a refund when the obsession has passed once I get the lay-buy off and hate half of it lmao!

      4. No! We don’t have it. Some stores have it during the holidays and it used to be a lot more popular. I’m not sure why it has lost it’s popularity. I am too sensible with my money. I call myself thrifty 🙂 I think that secondhand can be great, so I love going to thrift stores and secondhand shops. That’s how I try to control my obsessions and the feeling of guilt associated with spending too much 😉 I like your idea though because you can’t return secondhand 🙂 You

      5. if I weren’t so curvy I could shop second hand but it really isn’t worth the time and petrol to look around on purpose to save money on clothing etc here in Brisbane. It’s a long way between shops that have a good enough ‘fat section’ and it’s mostly gross or for old ladies in the 80s lol.

        I do love second hand shopping for furniture etc though, but seriously here, things are the same prices or only slightly dearer new. Sometimes it’s dearer to buy second hand. It’s all screwed up!

      6. Hahaha 🙂 Gross and old ladies in the 80s, love it. Do you ever make your own clothes? I’m kind of on a make-my-own clothes kick right now. It will probably die down eventually.

        Second-hand furniture is also one of my favorite things to hunt for 🙂 But, yes, if they label it “vintage” then they jack-up the price. I hate that. We have one good store in my hometown where things are dirt cheap and really cool. I got a neat chair there that I just love and a japanese teapot, both vintage 🙂

      7. I have to travel to Sydney to get fat girl clothes second hand that are worth buying and all of it is dirt cheap, furniture the lot. It is almost worth the 12 hour drive down there for a shopping trip!

        I own a (you’re going to fall into your chair, get the smelling salts someone!) brand new, never out of the box sewing machine and have had for over 18 months….are you ok? Are you weeping?????

        I just seriously lack the space to put it anywhere! I live in a tiny tiny place meant for one with one other person. I bought a sewing table from Ikea (a table that will fit a sewing machine on it I mean) and we just don’t have the space for it here. So no, I don’t make my own clothes but I dream of it.

        I dream of the day my EMT kicks right in and I find that place of calm and have the concentration to do something for more than 5 minutes. i’m the opposite of you – I don’t have ADD or anything I just lack focus and concentration and I’m told that part of all my conditions. I can’t sit through a tv show, I certainly can’t read, I can’t even sit through one magazine article. So sewing at the moment would turn into something I despise/avoid but withina few months maybe we can jig this house around and find space to open my box of machine 😀

      8. Oh my goodness! That is too far to drive, so I totally understand that 😦 I had no idea the distance was that far.
        I have a tiny apartment too 😦 We have to keep piling crap in our already full storage closet. I hate it. I put my sewing machine on my old desk and put it in a corner of my bedroom. I think it looks pretty cute 🙂 Sewing takes up a lot of room though. Somehow I always manage to get pins everywhere! I usually have to keep Chester out because he will: 1) try to paw the needle while the machine is running, or 2) Run off with straight pins in his mouth. It’s terrifying. He is such a stinker.
        Anywhere, hopefully one day you can use your sewing machine 🙂 It’s pretty fun and I’m kind of weird I guess because I like the smell of a sewing machine 😉

      9. LMAO! I missed you and your posts over the weekend! I was refreshing my Reader like “wheeeert?? Megan has weekends off! Unbelievable!”

      10. ooh I had my prescribed medication for Emotional Modulation Therapy plus 3 drinks and I could NOT keep my eyes open and was in bed and showered by 7pm on Saturday night…I was supposed to be taking myself out for a lovely evening but nuh! I understand 🙂 *tears glisten in the corner of my eyes at your absence regardless*

      11. also I don’t know what I meant when I said I like the smell of meats…that is a typo and I can’t figure it out!

  28. I enjoy the fact that you are so actively observing your own behaviour. Now I am pissed that the wants to write the ugly way without an “u”. But what I wanted to say is the following. I am struggling so hard with most people not doing that. They always claim, they do. But all I can see is a distortion of their real being and a tendency to criticize others for exactly their own faulty ways. Am I like that? I don’t want to, so I’m not. But I know your struggle. I’ve stopped doing more things than I can count. Fortunately I got music and somehow it sticks with me. So I got one constant, better than none. I feel the urge to thank everyone here for their writings. Makes me not feel all alone. So sincere thanks are given to you as well.

    1. It is wonderful to have something constant in your life, especially music. Being able to play an instrument is something I’ve always wished I could do and it’s great that you can. I tend to criticize others as well, but I think that’s most people. You’re certainly not alone in that 🙂

      I like the thing about “behaviour.” In the US we spell it without the U. So sorry! I didn’t realize it was ugly 🙂

      1. Yeah. My girls, all my instruments have names of women, are the ones tying my mind together. I am very glad.
        I think it is just me. I always had a thing for beauty in spelling. I am a grammar nazi, but these days you have to be very quite on the internet, when you are one 🙂
        And I don’t really care how others write, what they write is simply more important. My own is accuracy is important to me.

  29. Megan — I had a fleeting affair with being butch. I tried like hell to convince myself that if I dressed a certain way, I would feel a certain way. For me, it was putting on an air of being “tough” and “large” and “in control.” Then I met some butch women who were lanky, tall, skinny, beautiful and feminine. Perhaps you were looking for the youth that time steals away from us — whatever it was — thank it for showing you that you are perfectly human and wonderful exactly the way you are. Blessings. 🙂 xo

    1. I think in some ways you’re right. I feel that I didn’t have much of a young adult life and I went straight into being an old lady. Maybe I’m just looking for something to keep me young 🙂

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